April 30
10:58 am
raining. this is just too damn hard. Sy got me set up with the Day One app on my phone… can do dictation or adi audio recording for $4/mo. no drawing though. I’ll miss it… I hope. I’d hate to lose my mojo.
now, where’s my phone???
April 29
12:05 pm
sunny with high clouds. so wild to be doing this in the middle of the day. pencils done… Lise used a knife to carve away the wood. said she watched a youtube video so she wouldn’t ruin them. My handwriting is not getting any better… kindergarteners do better. Weird to be home but not really working. Sy think I should try a dictation program.
S* <— blob!
April 28
8:08 pm
sunny earlier but then cloudy… at least it stopped raining. slept some considering. meds are working. I can make my own coffee but the simple task of peeling a hard boiled egg is beyond me. pencils not sharpened yet… don’t want to bug Lise but I really noticed on today’s sketch. feet up watching Serena Williams on TV.
April 27
3:46 pm
snow overnight and now it’s been raining since I woke up. printing more legible than cursive and just as slow if not slower. every little thing takes for-freaking-ever. decided to draw only organically shaped things… straight lines are impossible. Lise said she’ll sharpen my pencils. thank goodness we have leftovers and that H, L & S are going to take turns cooking and ordering take out.
April 26
7:48 pm
cloudy all day with rain this afternoon though I didn’t see it. broke my wrist on my walk this am. I am so not a lefty! spent the day in the ED. pain meds working. hope I can sleep tonight. guess I won’t be cooking. Weird to be in the hosp. with all the masks. Stupid accident – stupid me for not paying attention,
April 25
2:52 pm
beautiful! mostly sunny with a few high clouds. warm too. back from shopping and there are a ton of people doing the same – all trying to keep the required distance and wearing their masks just like the grocery workers – there’s a few that don’t get it. noses peeking out from the top. glad to be home again. guess I’m not ready to go back, ready for “reopening”. agree we should start thinking about the process but I’m still reluctant. on my way outside to finally get the irises dug up, moved the white ones last year.
tomorrow? maybe make pizza again… we’ve got the fresh basil.
April 24
8:02 pm
mostly cloudy but no rain. an unexpectedly pleasant day. the neighbors didn’t have a fire last night thank goodness but there was a fire – a house fire yesterday afternoon in Meriden. was all over the news this morning. an old historic farmhouse. total loss but no one was hurt. made me realize that no matter how tough we think we have it. no… there’s no “we” here. I’m the one that was wallowing in self-pity. I am grateful for our health and our home… our refuge in these crazy up unpredictable days.
Saturday tomorrow… food shopping expedition and maybe a stop at the feed store for cat food.
April 23
8:22 pm
all sunny – all day. breezy, but not impossible – there is a no burning order though. that means our neighbors won’t be able to have their campfire tonight. Hank thinks they can since they use one of those fire ring/cauldron things. we’ll see. took a very long walk after I clocked out. went up to the shopping center just to see how busy it was and to see people. people I don’t know. thought about going in to the grocery store but no… decided to be responsible and stay out.
feeling a little better after a good night’s sleep… but they’re forecasting rain tomorrow… sigh.
April 22
8:37 pm
woke up to an inch of snow! didn’t last, the sun took care of that. clouds rolled in later but it’s cold and blustery. it really hit me today… really really! hate having my “office” in our bedroom, hate having to stay home, hate the weather, and hate cooking. (Even though I used to love it.) just in a slump. feeling unmoored, it just happened to me later than the kids and even Hank. kept drying how I felt but can’t do that forever.
what to do to make this better?
how can I learn acceptance?
April 21
8:07 pm
sunny ’till mid-morning when the rains came. poured but then the sky cleared for the time being. fortunately i got that walk in nice and early it it was cold. hard to believe but the sun warmed it up nice and fast. worked up a nice sweat and had to unzip my double layers. too cold when starting but too warm when finishing. quick shower and it was time to sign in. blah-blah-blah… more meetings. our conversations are so stilted. you’d think we’d be over it by now – we’ve been doing this long enough,
feeling cranky this evening… think I’ll go to bed early… and tomorrow? Maybe try some breathing exercises.
Skylark Karma 